Tight-Knit

[Chu]

I see Midorea as a pretty tight-knit community. We know and care deeply for one another. But why is it that when I see the phrase "tight-knit" being used for other communities, I get such a different picture?

Birds of a feather flock together, as they say - maybe those communities are characterized by different traits than we are. Generally, I don't see many arguments here. If two users disagree, they seem to let bygones be bygones. But in some other "tight-knit" communities, if one person disagrees with the general opinion, they seem to get ganged up on. No one tries to understand where they're coming from. In a way a tight-knit community can alienate people just as easily as a distant one, merely because one person doesn't full assimilate. Why is it that I don't see this on Midorea? I'm beginning to think that my biases are blinding me to some things, but I'd rather believe that we just have open-minded users. :P What do you think?

[Maeve]

It's because we are special!

No (well, maybe), seriously, it's kind of a hard question. Maybe it's because users are a bit older or more mature here. Or maybe they're simply more laid back and make less drama in general. Or maybe it's because the people who would not fit well in our community don't stick around anyway.

I think one of the biggest problems for forums/communities is misunderstanding. It's sometimes hard to understand the tone of a post, and some people are easily offended. So, of course, if the person who disagrees with something make a post that sounds even just a little like an attack, and the people reading/receiving it take it as an attack, well, yeah, drama
People here seem to be able to express themselves in a respectful manner, and I guess it makes it easier for the whole community to live peacefully.

I must say I haven't spent much time on other communities recently, so I can't really share any comment about them.
And sorry if this makes no sense, I really need some sleep... o.O''

[sychobunny]

Maeve might have a point with the age thing, but I also think part of it is that the community is small, but with lots of options. People tend to stay in their forums that they like. If I'm off put by something someone says, I can go to another section and not see them or their post until I don't care anymore. >.< though this might be my general coping mechanism with anything. I have noticed that it doesn't work in all communities though, and I end up leaving for long periods of time because I keep running into someone I don't like.

[Chu]

I do think that we generally have older and more mature users than most sites, but I dunno. Somehow it makes it seem like all of the respectable people on the internet gathered here, which is obviously unrealistic. xP I lurk plenty of forums and even if I can go to a different part of a forum to avoid reading a certain member's post, there are always a few other people who bother me just as much, haha.

Maybe it is because we're small. I dunno.

[Weaseldale]

Most of the users I know are in their teens and twenties, usually early twenties I think but a few younger... so I wouldn't necessarily say it's because we have older, more mature users.

One of the differences I have noticed between this site and other "tight-knit" sites is that on the other sites, everyone goes everywhere and they all pretty much know each other sort of... not that I'm on many other sites, but still. While there are Midoreans who can be found all over the site, a lot of us also fall into a sort of clique type thing. There are people who only talk in the lounge, people who never leave fun & games or the battle system, people who mainly stay in the art forums, and so on. So yeah, if we disagree with someone about something, we can just go off to another part of the site they never go to and then we get over it.

And... maybe it's just me, but if I see someone around that seems like someone who is immature in a bad way or likely to cause drama to me... I don't really talk to them much. So I guess if other people do that it could make someone feel unwelcome, leading to the dramatic/less laid-back people to just not sticking around. I dunno.

Midorea does have the occasional drama though. Every once in a verrryy long while.
But yeah, I'm not really on very many other community sites like this so I could be wrong, but that's some of the reasons we're a little different. (Of course, the users that stay here /do/ seem to be more open-minded and such about things ^^;)

[Yggdrasil]

I never really thought of it. Hmn...

Well in a lot of other sites, I have been on quite a few i do see, like all the others saidl, we are small and most of us, from what i've sen so far in my brief time here, gather in certian areas, or tend to lurk or play around in the battle system. Our age and matureity lvl may have a slight amount to di with it All around though i"m not exactally sure.

[Malverne]

Well, I think it might be because we, as a community, don't really let arguments get to that point. If two people are arguing, the people around them seem to try to smooth it out, instead of just letting the two fight.

[Yggdrasil]

i havent seen much of that yet, wel much arguing in general. I'm sure i'll understand it better as i continue to hang around, but it's nice to know people on here are like that.

[ecco]

"Start as you mean to go on" - we are indeed a small community. and i think the age range is generally higher than most avatar sites (perhaps, im no expert obviously but the demographic of say, gaia, seems to be younger, for the most part)

basically i think because of the attitudes of those of us who've been around since it's earlier days (not necessarily myself, i've not been here since the beginnings - but a while enough, anyway) it encourages others to take the same approach. when people disagree here, the general response is more or less to shrug and say "fair enough. moving on..." and change the subject or whatever.

i think because everyone here is like this, those who join and would start proper arguments, drama, flame-wars etc can't actually cause any trouble, because the response of the majority here already doesn't allow it. we're not tempted into screaming and yelling at eachother. if there's no convincing somebody that you're right and they're wrong, we, as a whole, just leave it. we don't get petty. i think because of this general attitude to disagreements, it stops people who would destroy the peace from sticking around.

Fact is, some people are argumentative and enjoy causing trouble - some people get a kick out of a good ol' fashioned verbal fight. people like that don't get the response they want here. so they leave. as for others who cause arguments out of simple immaturity, my guess is they never stick around because they find that, when feeling "victimised" (ie in real terms, someone disagreed with them - oh noes!) nobody here really takes sides. nobody starts flaming and slagging anybody else off just because they have a different opinion to anybody else.

i also like to think of us, as a whole, as untrollable. that's probably inviting trouble in itself, though. XD

/endramblingnonsense.

[Chu]

Hm... Yeah, I'd have to say that I agree with each of you a bit. Definitely the untrollable part though. ;p We too chill.

Admittedly though I do really enjoy a good debate. That's obviously not the same as a full-out argument, but y'know. Sometimes I try to get a debate going in The University and I guess because everyone takes that "to each their own" perspective on things, it's pretty much impossible, haha.

[sychobunny]

I love verbal debate/arguments! -but I don't think they work in forums, so I don't partake of them online.

[OrangeAutumn]

Yes, I agree with all of you.

A lot of the big problems I have come across, especially in Gaia or Neopets is that the age bar starts to get lower as I get older and emotions get very heated and tied in with a lot of response put into threads. It was one of the reasons why I left Gaia and Neopets because I couldn't cope with the immaturity level and the alienated feeling that I didn't belong in that age-range/group any longer.

Midorea is a great place to be because of how paced Midorea is to my work/school life. There is a lot of good thought out communication here and it helps a ton that we try to be literate here. (I just can't stand words being butchered intentionally, internet speak makes me cringe).

Ah... You guys already posted what I wanted to say. Hahah I'm glad we all feel good about Midorea.

[ecco]

ahhh but Chu, ecco loves discussion! XD (i just... get scared of walls of text sometimes )

but yea! jeez. i joined a game in beta and gave up on it within about 2 weeks - its in BETA, the point is to give feedback, right? yet you try to do that and within 5 minutes somebody is commenting back basically having a go at you for "having a go" at the developers - um, it's called constructive criticism, dickhead. learn it and until you do GTF OFF THE INTERNET.

*phew* needed to vent that.

[Chu]

sycho, yeah, the internet does tend to make civil debates a lot more complicated than they need to be. But I think that, with the right group of people, it is possible. I've debated with friends plenty of times online. Then again, we DO know each other personally, so the dynamics aren't exactly the same.


Autumn, oh lawd Gaia and Neopets. Don't take me back to those days.


ecco, yeah, that's another thing I hate. "Close" communities often have their heads too far up someone's arse (usually someone in a position of authority) that the slightest hint of constructive criticism sets them off. And being the tough critic I am, that makes me a lot of enemies. I can't tell you how glad I am that Cat is open to different opinions and methodds - she doesn't take it personally, or, if she does, it's not obvious at all. Makes things run much more smoothly. :]

[killerkitty]

The community is one of the best things about Midorea, I find (though everything else is fantastic too). I've never been able to stay on a site for longer than a month, but with Mido, it's different. You guys are great!
I feel kinda bad for being so lurky recently. I should make an effort to post more in this place I love.