Just WHAT the heck is wrong with me? Can't I have a say?

[Trebble Cleff]

Every website I go to.
Every school I have been in.
All the friends I have made, present and past.
Can't I have a say?
It seems that I'm always different from everyone.
I can't have a say.
My opinions are never heard.
I'm a Catholic and against gay/bi/and lez.
Just because of that, I only have about two friends in real life.
I'm Asian and I like it.
Just because of that, I am ignored by almost all my teachers.
I'm a little small for my age.
Because of that, almost everyone despises me.
I believe hatred is the worst thing in the world, and the seven deadly sins follow that. Also Blasphemy.
Because of that, I'm stared at.
I'm underweight.
I get glares.

I think it's unfair.
How can you judge someone by their characterists like that?

[Transcendence]

I think that judging someone by their characteristics is the only way to judge anyone at all.

If you are something as part of your character, then that is who you are. Should I just forget it and never judge some one off their characteristics? Never judge someone at all?

[Keito]

You're against gays/lesbians. Perhaps some people are just against short Asians.

[Fallain]

people do judge based on characteristics like that. Sorry to be the one to break it to you, but those don't seem like very likeable qualities.

I'm not telling you to change yourself, no one should have to do that, no matter what they believe in, but maybe start looking outside the box.

Would you prefer it if people pretended to like you instead? Fake friends that secretly hated you but talked to you in class and made you happy just so you'd have a "friend." I think i'd rather have 2 good, honest friends than a bunch of fake ones. And if your unhappy with that, maybe there are other people out there like you and you just haven't found them yet. Don't let it get you down.

Being asian and small aren't something you can change though so learn to take pride in it. As for being underweight, unless you have an eating disorder the people glaring at you are only jealous. Ignore them. In a few years you'll graduate and all of this will seem petty and you'll feel retarded for even worrying about it.

[TheMountainScene]

Now hold up, how can you judge her just because she's Catholic and asian and short and stuff?
Anything can be perfectly likeable, as long as you change your perspective:
My first girlfriend was a short chinese girl. She was cute and really thoughtful of other people.
Asians have a wide spectrum of different personalities. I have about a dozen different asian friends and only like 3 of them are similar.
I am Christian, yes, but I think organized religion can help get people's lives put back togethor when they are in shambles. Like mine. Sure, I don't agree with some Catholic teachings, but that doesn't mean she's a bad person.
I think you should get to know someone before you judge them on anything. In fact, most people that are judged prematurely are the ones that turn out to be the good friends, I think.
So there! Have a little more heart and a little more faith in people.

Edit: That might have been a little more passionate than it needed to be. I get this kinda stuff from a lot of my friends at school, so I gave the usual speech... ^_^; sorry about that...

[Fallain]

It's hard to have faith in someone who doesn't have faith in themselves. She posts this like she's given up on being accepted and people CAN sense insecurity or aggression from people and it wards them off.

And by the way this sounds she's also judging the people that judges her so it's contradictory. You can't expect people to not judge you if you do the same to them or close yourself off and practically hang a sign around your neck that says 'shun me'.

A positive attitude does a world of good. High school is an emotional waste of time anyways. Hold your head high and move on. If the people there don't accept you, don't change for them, you'll find others that do. It's a big world.

[TheMountainScene]

Yeah that came out a little more heated than I wanted it to. But still.
It's hard not to be pessimistic about just about anything when people stuff you like that. I think a pick me up would definitely raise the self-esteem levels a bit.
And then we'd have that good hope that you were talking about.
And I fail to see the hypocricy (sp?) in what she was talking about...

[Fallain]

Maybe the teachers aren't hating her because she's asian, maybe the people aren't glaring at her because she's underweight, as anyone actually came out and said this to her face?

Paranoia, it gets the best of you when your self contentious. When you hate something about yourself like your weight or ethnic and people do things that upset you, you automatically assume the worst and judge them.

I know what it's like, I hated the way I looked in school and everytime someone would so much glance my way i'd get aggressive and want to hurt them for thinking bad thoughts about me that they more than likely never even thought. Once I started respecting myself, I became calmer, and brushed off people looking at me. If you don't want people to judge you, you can't judge them to be that bad guys that would do something like that.

[Keito]

[OMG MY FACE]

Okay so we all know judging is wrong. You're complaining how people judge you and how much it sucks, but you made a post to judge those people. I don't want to get too into this because it's ridiculous and rather ticks me off, to be honest. But on an interesting note, how odd is it to see this?

[Yazoo]

I agree with OMG MY FACE.
You are discriminating against people who have a certain sexuality which, actually, can't be helped while they can be perfectly fine people because it has nothing to do with their character while you go 'boo hoo hoo poor me'.

Now, I don't mean to be rude, but don't you think you're placing yourself higher then the average human being?
You can judge them but they can't judge you?
That's kind of strange, don't you think? You get what you give, after all.

And if your opinions aren't heard, then say them again. And are they actually not heard or do you just think so? A lot of things are a way of thought after all, not neccasarily true.

Really, no one dispises someone for height. That's quite an absurt thing to say. If you're underweight and can't help it, then get over it. If you're underweight and can help it; eat.

And on a note; everyone is always different from everyone. No one is the same. How does it feel to get a reply from a bi-sexual person? Do you hate me now~? <3

[IndigoButerfly]

I agree with all the "if you don't want to be judged, don't judge yourself" comments. I know it's hard, but try to compair yourself and the ones you hate or you claim to be hated by.

....

see any resemblance? Lets take the fact that you hate gays.
You see a gay guy ok? What do you do? do you think? "freak of nature that should've never been born or should just go back to liking woman because they're wrong" and never try to look pass that fact they're gay and get to know them? do you? You don't give them even a slightest chance? you never doubt you're wrong about this?

Now lets put you in to the gay guys place. You walk past someone and you see a glare. That person might be thinking this " stupid small asian girl why is she even here? go back to eating rice with pandas ya freak" and they never give you a chance. They don't try to get to know you.

Do you see where I'm heading?

Here's the deal; the people that you think hate you and you dislike them back... those people have a part of you that you hate about yourself.
In short; you hate yourself.
For one or other reason you hate something about yourself, and while that hatred is there, you will automatically feel hated too.

Liars never trust other people.
Thiefs never lend their stuff.
Cheaters are paranoid about being cheated on.
Haters are afraid of being hated.

Do you see the "takes one to know one" in this? It's not that other people hate you, it's because you have hate in yourself and it's the reason why you think others hate you.

I've got rid of the hate I once had. Believe me, I did. I'm now a very happy person. My looks aren't those you'd instantly fall in love with, nor I'm considered "normal" in my school either, but I got over that because I'm confident and who I am and what I believe in.

I wasn't trying to be mean, I just hoped I helped you.

[Maeve]

*pets Indigo's back*

It's funny how we think in the same way. I'm so glad I claimed you now!

But let's go back on topic and analyze Trebble Cleff's post. First, if you think your opinions are never heard, maybe it's because you don't express them correctly or in a correct place. I mean, I strongly believe in freedom of thought and won't judge what you believe (though I really feel like doing it), but you know, there's a difference between saying "I don't think being gay is ok." and saying "All gay people should die!". And in the same way, there are places that are better to let your voice be heard, and places that are not so good for that. Not necessarily because the people there don't like you or something, but just because they are not in the mood to have more serious talk.

Second argument: you are catholic and against gay/bi/lesbian and your other beliefs. Then you should be able to find other catholic people to talk with that are most likely to accept your opinions, and maybe some non-catholic people that are just more open to discussion. I mean, of course, if you walk into a group of gays and start talking to them like they shouldn't exist and should change their ways, there's a good chance they won't listen. By looking to groups of people who are most likely to think like you, there's a bigger chance they will accept you and your opinions. And about the gay thing, I think Indigo pretty much said it all.

Third thing: you're Asian, small and underweight. Bah! some people are idiots and judge you on your appearance. So what! Just ignore them. I've always believed that people who would judge me on my appearance were not sharing my values, and therefor I just don't feel like I need to talk to them.

Of course, if people are feeling that you're judging them in a bad way, there's a good chance they will do the same with you. Maybe just try to get to know people a little more before you judge them. People usually try to avoid negative people or people they feel would automatically reject them and their ideas. So if you look open to discussion, even if you keep your own opinions and values, there's a bigger chance people will talk with you. I mean, did you ever try to start a conversation with someone that said "Here's my opinion and I don't want to hear anything else!" Believe me, it doesn't make a good conversation!

[Catghost]

[Weaseldale]

I agree mostly with Catghost. While the rule about not hating people isn't always obeyed, she never did say she hated them, just that she was against them. No need to attack her. Everyone has their own opinion.