SO lets look at what happened to me?

[Hiroku]

[LadyKai]

because ur supposed to start ur period at the end of the package

i started my pills on the 5th day of my period and im half way through the pack and i started my period

10 days after i stopped its suposed to be every 28days+

[Hiroku]

o__O be careful. . . those things can really screw you up if you arent careful. . . *hugs*

[NaomieKeiko]

I can't remember what I said and those signs are screwing up my posts GRRRR
♥ I can't remember what I said earlier D:
I think I said something like "Girls like that are morons and guys that do that are bastards, it always seems like the good girls choose the bastards over the sweet guys, but I'm sure you'll find a good girl eventually *giggles* or guy" Now to report that those gay symbols are screwing my posts up

[Merelia]

[Hiroku]

Keiko; Hiroku is not looking for a guy. . . and I dont think I am gonna find a good girl either. . . But thanks.

Merelia: Its very hard to offend me. . . you can call me a dumb ugly stupid piece of crap and I would most likely agree with you. Its simple really. . . I care about others thats why I try and help them while I hate myself and dont care about myself past the point of staying alive.

I do look withing myself. . . I dont like myself. . . So I am hard on myself to make myself tougher and stronger. . . XD

[Merelia]

I use to attempt to help others at one point in my life. I spent years focused on my friends, and not paying much attention to myself. I use to hate myself, so I figured I would spend my life helping others, when I felt that I couldn't be helped. Might as well watch others move forward because of me, right? That was my motto.

But after spending time with these friends, watching them progress forward, and forgetting completely about me... it all became different. I saw them get back on their feet, push me off to the side, or even backstab me.. while I, on the other hand, continued to stay in the same position. "Why am I doing this to myself? I'm so stupid!" I told myself that nearly every day. I said a lot more things to.

After spending time analyzing, looking at my life, and realizing what I had been doing... it was like I saw a light. I began changing slowly, focusing on myself, and attempting to accept who I was. I began working on my life, attempting to piece everything together, and to stop living for others. It took time, but it worked out in the end.


You can still put yourself down Hiro, but I'm positive there will come a day where you too will see the light that I once saw. I really hope that it will be soon, so that you can begin to make changes, and to not be so hard on yourself.

[Hiroku]

Haha. . . I have had a lot of people do that to me too. I help people and then they leave once they dont need me anymore. . . Every now and then they come back into my life for a day or so and are like "OMG I missed you so much" and then they vanish again. . .

I have accepted it and I really dont care. It may sound and or be sad but I dont expect my friends to stay in my life. . . if they do then great if not then all that really matters to me is that they are happy and take care of themselves.

People like me. . cause I am me. . . I know I will change and most people never stop changing. I will continue to change and maybe that will happen. . .the whole "light" thing. . . but we cant know and I dont think it will. Life is life. . . I very well could keep attracting these horrible woman that just back stab me and break me down. . .

But yeah. . . *shrugs*

[Merelia]

I use to attract horrible people to me all the time. But I knew these people before meeting them personally. I was able to point them out, and keep away from them.

Oh, and I couldn't stand when people from my past would show up. I've been getting that recently. The people that walk out on you after you helped, and talk about how much they've missed you, etc etc.. I know I may sound like a bitch (I've been told), but I generally tell them that there's a reason they are in my past. I keep away from them.

[Hiroku]

Everyone that has done that to me. . . swears up and down that they didnt walk out. . . or that they couldnt help it and yeah. . .

*shrugs* I dont really care too much cause they almost always vanish again. . . I am just a fad. . . people love me or adore me or whaever for a week. . . a few months. . . maybe a few years. Then they move on and forget about me.

I can usually tell when a person is good or bad if I meet the face to face. . . Online i can talk to them for a day or two then know fairly well if they are a decent person. Issue is. . .people change and online a lot of the things a person want. . . are not so easily seen.

[Chu]

@Mere: I'm the same way. A lot of people question my strength but they don't realize that I've dealt with a lot of things in my life; more than they ever have.

XD I realize that I AM hard to get; it's nearly impossible to get my attention. But how does that make me awesome? O:

I wish that I could stop helping others and then allow them to hurt me afterwards. Sadly though, I'm like a pet dog. I love my friends and family unconditionally, and even if they backstab me, or literally hit me, I can't stop loving them. Sadly, I'd be one of those pathetic girls that would stay in an abusive relationship. I know that. I hate the fact that I can't stop loving someone that hurts me, but luckily I've had someone keep those people away from me for the most part.



@Hiro: Another similarity between the two of us. I dislike myself but I realize that it's because I have high expectations for myself. I'll never be pleased with my grades, looks, aspirations, achievements, ect. but as long as I'm helping people I can at least be content with myself. I think you need to realize that you're never going to be able to please yourself.

People leave because you don't chase them. Of course I'm being a hypocrite because I never chase anyone, but the point remains the same. If someone leaves my life, then sure. Leave. If they come back then sure. Come back. I don't care about a lot of people, and as for the ones I do care about; I just don't chase them either. I figure that everything happens for a reason, and if they're meant to be in my life then they will be. People stay with me because I'm a rock, so if a lot of people walked out of my life right now, they'd be lost.


OHMYGODWHATALONGPOST. DX

[Hiroku]

Not mad at chu. . . Just I hate when people say I dont chase them. . . .

I always hear the crap that I didnt try hard enough from my "friends". . . when its both peoples faults when you grow appart but simply put you can not always stop it. . . it happens and sometimes a person wont give you much choice to stp them.

[Chu]

That's true. It's always both people's faults, and there's no way around it. If you want to make it black and white, eventually, one person chooses not to look back and the other chooses to stop chasing. Sorry to offend you though.

[Merelia]

@Chu - You're awesome because of the way you think and speak. I find that I agree with you a lot of times. What I was referring to. ^_^

Scorpios (yeah I'm bringing in astrology lol) tend to stick close to those whom they love. Once they love, they love forever... or at least for a long time. XD They're very close to their families and friends, and often times, don't realize the hurt caused by others, because their love often times blurs out the pain. So it makes sense for you to feel that way.


As for the chasing situation. I'm one that doesn't chase others, but I have found myself to chase people whom I love dearly, after a heated battle. But the thing is, is that they did the same to me. So yes, it all depends on both individuals. The friendship/relationship solemnly depends on both individuals, and how they both feel... as well as whether or not they continue to keep a strong bond with one another. Unfortunately, if one chooses to leave, there is not much you can do about it. But that is their decision. If they choose to walk away, and risk losing something potentially great, then it's their choice. They've chosen their path.


Also, on a side note. I think a lot of us have high expectations of ourselves. Just another part of life.

[Chu]

Ah, I see. xP I find that I agree with you a lot too though. Haha.

I don't know about the high expectations... it's just that, when I look at a lot of my peers, I see that they don't really SEEM like they do. Then again, it could be that they expect highly of themselves, and just aren't willing to put forth the effort. *shrugs*