ecco
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 Posted: Tue Dec 21, 2010 10:49 pm
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| its odd. some say if they love you, they'll wait - and i agree, to the extent that they should wait til you are "ready".
but for me... how could i wait til marriage? for me sex is a way for me to feel closer to someone I am in love with. what is more intimate than two bodies together? or more a sign of trust than allowing yourself to be so vulnerable with them?
i mean really... if its your belief and you are devoted to that cause then fair play. equally, if you think sex is purely for pleasure and you enjoy one night stands, fair play - so long as the people you get with know that that is all it is.
but again, for me, sex is a part of love and vice versa. i don't think i could possibely have one without the other.
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_________________
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Breaker-Lim
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Posted: Mon Jan 03, 2011 2:47 pm
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| Your body is your own and you decide what you want to do with it. Your virginity is only as important as you think it is, and for some people this is the most important decision for a teen.
Personally, I don't value sex as anything more than a pleasurable experience. It doesn't go with love for me, so I find no value in saving it. I just make sure other people know this, so we don't have any misunderstandings. I respect people who believe that sex is important, even if I do not.
I guess that in general, waiting for sex is important until you are ready to deal with the consequences. For some people, that means waiting until marriage. For others, it's after you meet someone special. In any case, your virginity is only as important as you think it is, and as long as you respect yourself and others, there should be no problems.
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_________________
You should click on this. Seriously. You know you want to.
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Alyssia
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Posted: Tue Jan 11, 2011 5:48 pm
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| I'm 21 and I'm still waiting~
I'm a bit of a stiff when it comes to this, so I feel like you should take what I have to say with a grain of salt
I'm waiting for a few reasons, some person, some family related, and some dealing with my faith. And to top it all of I already know that none of the guys I've been with are the kinds of guys I'd marry.
Giving it up for me isn't about the wooing, although its a nice though. For me its more like this is my gift to give and I'll give it to the one that I see fit and no other, why should I settle just for some fun? (that would be the marrying kind...who I've yet to run into)
I feel like its my choice, and if he isn't they kind of guy that can respect that and learn to deal with it then he really doesn't have to stick around and wait with me, I'm sure he can find someone that is willing anyway so I don't feel the need to be bothered about it. I make it a point to say it from the time we start considering looking at each other as more than friends too. I make it as clear as I can that if its going to be an issue for him then we should just squash our feeling and move on.
You have to think though, because this really has to deal with you, you're the one placing the value on your virginity. So what's it worth to you and is this person worth more than that to you? You've also got a pact that you wish to honor and because that's something that you obviously have a high value of then you have a lot to consider and its not something you should mull over while in the moment. Yea it can be a tough battle to fight, but at the same time when you get to the bottom line of things its what you want to give, to who and when and under what terms.
You also have to be totally ready for whatever may happen there after...weather it be a child, a break up, or a venereal disease...or an awful mix there of....not to mention how any of those could change the rest of your life.
I know plenty of girls that are waiting, and those that aren't and at the end of the day we all feel the same way.....Consider the Cost, Consider what you could Lose, and Consider if you're Willing to Pay. If you can come to terms with all these things and give yourself a green light then by all means go get'em If not then hold out.
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Madam Kira
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Posted: Sun Feb 27, 2011 12:20 pm
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| I sort of want to wait till marriage, so that it can be something specially, but on the other hand, what if when we're married we find we're sexually incompatible. I probably won't end up waiting till marriage. >.<
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ecco
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Posted: Sun Feb 27, 2011 7:21 pm
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| That's one of the things i always thought was a possible downside to waiting to be married, lol. so many jokes about sexless marriages... some of 'em have gotta be caused that way XD
also, im of the thinking that it's healthy to explore your sexuality. but then, apparently i'm weird, cos for me sex and love go hand in hand - i can't have sex with someone if there arent strong romantic feelings involved. *shrug*
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_________________
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Madam Kira
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Posted: Sun Feb 27, 2011 10:29 pm
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| I agree with you there.
Romantically, for me, there would have to be something there.
I couldn't give it away to just anywhere.
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ecco
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Posted: Mon Feb 28, 2011 2:35 pm
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| yea, tho i don't just mean the first time - anytime, tbh, just feels wrong getting intimate with someone that i dont have real feelings for XD
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_________________
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Imaginative Sarah
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Posted: Thu Apr 21, 2011 2:59 pm
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| I'm 16 and have already had given it up pretty early...but my bf had never pressured me to rush. i could of waited longer if I wanted to...but I mean.. unless you really know if he loves you or not. I advise you to wait. I think it is best to wait if a guy really loves you he can wait. mien never pressured me into it whatsoever i kind of asked myself.. idk. just so caught up when you are in love with someone... I mean, I don't regret it because I'm truely in love with him and plan on being with him forever..and he says that as well. but.. I advise you all to wait if you havn't already! just for sanity sakes. and beyond reasons... idk... it depends. you either ready or you arn't..funny. I always thought id be really old before it happened..but ya know..you can't go back. important thing is at least I felt ready and he didn't pressure me...he asked me many times if I was sureeee... no pressure...
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Asymmetric
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Posted: Sat Nov 19, 2011 12:24 am
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| For me it doesn't come down to being married or not, but by being absolutely sure that I'm doing it with the person that I want to do it with. Not that he'll be the love of my life forever or anything, but that at the moment that we do it, we both want it and have a nice time and love each other.
I am 21 and haven't done it. I am very patient with waiting for that right time and for the guy that I want to do it with.
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