Midorea V3 Development Merch | Search | Memberlist | Vault | The Forge | Battle! | Temple
   
  
Goody Shop Reward

      Log-In   Not a member? Register Now! 
Midorea Forum Index / The University
Goto page 1, 2, 3  Next
Post new topic   Reply to topic "The Talk"
BubbleTrouble



Send private message


 PostPosted: Mon Aug 24, 2009 6:28 pm Reply with quote        
That's right, every parent's worst nightmare. The Talk, the unavoidable time when the kids aren't going to believe that Mom and Dad wished really hard for a baby.

When I was nine years old I found out the truth about babies and where they came from, it was a bit of a shock really because when I had always asked my Mom before she had told me they grew in the Mommy's stomach for nine months, I was none the wiser to how the baby got there. I liked this story of the baby growing for nine months, so I asked this question often, "where do babies come from? You can imagine my shock when my Mom (randomly to me) told me told me how the baby came to be in the stomach. Of course later I learned this was the womb. But anyway, it was a bit of a shock as I didn't really care to know it.

So here are the topics to discuss:

> How old were you when you learned about sex?
> How old do you think children should be to learn about sex?
> Do you think that a child should be told by their parent of the same gender about it?
> Do you think children should just be taught sex in school?
> Anything you wish to add for this topic.


_________________
BubbleBurst! - My Quest thread

MelancholyMelody~ wrote:
'Sup? 'S goin' diddly-down in DA HOOD, YO?
Raezarin



Send private message


 PostPosted: Mon Aug 24, 2009 9:43 pm Reply with quote        
Ah, let me tell you a little story...

It was in 5th grade when we first started sex ed. It was pretty much labeling naughty bits and learning about the female reproductive cycle. Then we went scientific about babies and learned the whole egg+sperm+nine month=baby.
Not really a sex talk, until we had a class discussion and someone was bright enough to ask the crucial question

"But how does the sperm get inside the uterus?"

And my poor gym teacher, blushing with embarrassment, had no choice but to answer. " Well, the man inserts his penis into the woman's vagina and releases the sperm during intercourse."

Not the exact wording, but close enough (and yeah, there was a great 'ewww!' at this revelation. Dude that's just NASTY, no?). So i learned when i was 10-11 and it was told to me in school. The only 'talk' i ever got was when i got a boyfriend it it was really short and to the point, as my parents knew that I wasn't the kind of girl that needed to be told not to be reckless.

As for what I think SHOULD be done, that depends on the child and how mature they are. Some kids learn earlier and are fine with it, some would rather not know until it becomes unavoidable. If a parent is explaining things then it should be the one of the same gender as the child to avoid extra awkwardness. I don't know about everywhere else, but I live in Canada and as you've already read they tell us about sex during school.

Although when it comes to girls there's another way of determining when to have a 'Talk', meaning whenever she gets her period you're going to have to explain why her body's doing that.

_________________
Tell me about your day...
newdivision



Send private message


 PostPosted: Tue Aug 25, 2009 8:01 am Reply with quote        
When I found out, I was 10 flipping through a science book, and my first thought was, "I don't get it." After sex ed classes and teen romance books, I got it. I was kind of freaked out at first and just didn't think about it at all, now that I reflect in it it's one of nature's gifts (if you will).

My classes were with boys and girls separate. In the 5th grade we learned about periods and whatnot, in the 6th grade we learned about boys and sex, in the 7th grade we learned more about both, and in the 8th grade we had boys and girls together and talked about pregnancy, AIDs, STDs, contraceptives, etc. My parents never talked to me about the classes but my mom told me there were pads if I needed them, how to shave my legs and gave me the American Girl book about puberty. IT was pretty easygoing, not awkward at all.

I think a parent of the same gender should explain to their child, around the time puberty begins, so there's an explanation. They should also make sure the child is mature enough to take it seriously. Not all parents teach their kids, so it should also be taught in school, maybe on one day in the whole year that would take up a few classes.

_________________
Visit my art website:
http://newdivision-00.deviantart.com/

Shop at my store!:
http://midorea.com/viewtopic.php?p=144435#144435
Chu
Assistant Admin


Send private message


 PostPosted: Tue Aug 25, 2009 3:02 pm Reply with quote        
I don't remember much about learning about sex. I do know that I got a book about periods and such in fifth grade, along with deodorant and pads, but as soon as my mom saw it she took it and hid it for some reason. After my cousin got pregnant at sixteen though she told me about some things, but I forget what I learned from my mom and what I learned from my friends.

I don't really think the talk is all that important, honestly. Even when I was young I knew there was something more to the whole idea of a stork putting a baby in a mommy's belly. I took all of those revelations pretty well on my own, and would honestly be at a loss if I had to decide when to give it to my kid. I'd probably just wait until it "felt" right.


_________________
Add me on Skype! I'm ewitsChu. Even if we've never talked, just tell me your username in the friend request and I'll accept.

BubbleTrouble



Send private message


 PostPosted: Tue Aug 25, 2009 4:34 pm Reply with quote        
Yeah I think I'd wait for the moment when it felt right too, I have no idea when I think I would tell my child otherwise. To be honest I think I learned a bit late at the age of 9/10, I mean I had no clue up until then and I feel like a bit of an idiot. But when I think about one of my friends having learned at seven and even being given a book on how to do it at a young age, I feel as though she was to young. O_O

_________________
BubbleBurst! - My Quest thread

MelancholyMelody~ wrote:
'Sup? 'S goin' diddly-down in DA HOOD, YO?
MelancholyMelody~



Send private message


 PostPosted: Tue Aug 25, 2009 6:31 pm Reply with quote        
I agree with newdivison that it should be around the time puberty starts. That's a good "starter" for lack of a better word. Of course they'll need to be told so they don't freak out about it and understand what's going on, and if things are starting to change it's a good sign that they're ready to know.

With girls of course this means they may be getting told when they're younger than boys as they seem to start earlier and earlier these days, and in honestly telling a girl a little before she starts puberty or when the absolute first signs show up is a good ides, because if you leave it too late and she doesn't know why she's bleeding from her genitalia, she's going to be frickin' traumatised.

My mom told me primarily when I was around nine-ish. And it was fine.

I was always told girls can start at as young as nine years old, so around nine or ten is probably a good time; girls tend to be much more mature than boys anyway so they can handle it most of the time. I think I was about ten when we started to have sexual education classes. I have no idea how the boys' class went, it's actually weird to imagine it, but the girls were all the same really "Eww. Okay." Just like that. And I was the same, in fact, I didn't have the "eww" factor. I remember taking it as just what it was. I don't recall having any strong emotions either way.

Well, that was for sex of course. But then they didn't tell us the gruesome details about arousal and erections and things like that...though I didn't think about it. I suppose I just listened to what they said and was like "k sure w/e" about it like any other lesson. Didn't cause me to think too much. But when it came to learning about changing during puberty I was horrified. I could accept it as it happened to everyone and I thought "Well, it's normal so I shouldn't be scared. Every single adult has gone through it at some point." But it was when they said your interests would change and you could come out the other side of puberty as a different person I was horrified. I didn't want to change who I was. When I thought that the things I loved might change suddenly I was just... well, as I said, horrified. I liked liking those things.

Of course it wasn't as drastic as I thought, and I took it too literally due to having Asperger's Syndrome. That's one of the lovely things people with AS do. I didn't give a crap any of it, it was just what happened and who cares? But thinking I would change as a person was terrifying.


I think with my own kids I'd tell them when it felt right. And I do think that parents should be the ones to tell their children, as they know them personally, know how much they can handle and can have a one-on-one with them to answer any questions too embarrassing to ask in a classroom full of other kids. However schools teaching is vital for those parents who are just too wimpy about the whole thing.
I think you should know your own children and know when it's right to tell them. You know how mature they are and if they're asking a lot of questions about it and you think they'd be able to understand, go for it.
I don't like the idea of kids being told at like...seven or something. Unless they're particularly mature and curious about things to the point where a simple explanation/sugarcoated version won't deal with it, then fine, but it still gives me the heebie jeebies a bit.

Oh yeah I almost forgot. Parents of the same gender is better for less embarrassment. I feel sorry for single parents having to talk to kids of the opposite gender. Especially dads telling their little girls. Ouch.

ANYWAY I'VE RAMBLED AND STUFF SO LOLZ. ENJOY WALLOFTEXT.


_________________
Hey guys, as you may have noticed I'm currently not too active due to busyness, however if you need anything or just wanna drop me a line feel free to PM me, as when I check back I'm more likely to see it than posts. :3

iluglimpse Bouncy Heart
Howler Monkey



Send private message


 PostPosted: Wed Sep 16, 2009 3:22 pm Reply with quote        
I was like, eight when my mom told me all about that. I started my period when I was nine, thus inducing yet another 'talk'. o.e One was enough. But TWO?
MelancholyMelody~



Send private message


 PostPosted: Wed Sep 16, 2009 4:41 pm Reply with quote        
She didn't mention periods the first time? Wtf!?

_________________
Hey guys, as you may have noticed I'm currently not too active due to busyness, however if you need anything or just wanna drop me a line feel free to PM me, as when I check back I'm more likely to see it than posts. :3

iluglimpse Bouncy Heart
Howler Monkey



Send private message


 PostPosted: Fri Sep 18, 2009 6:19 pm Reply with quote        
MelancholyMelody~ wrote:
She didn't mention periods the first time? Wtf!?

No, she did. Periods was the subject. .-.
Then when I started, when I was nine she was all "LETS GET YOU START USING TAMPONS OKAY!?" And then it was the sex talk. DX

_________________
SEXta is SEXy. RANDOM pms ARE love!
Graymalkin



Send private message


 PostPosted: Thu Sep 24, 2009 9:41 am Reply with quote        
> How old were you when you learned about sex? I learned about bad sexual things earlier than kindergarden. And I learned first hand about rape when I was seven. So.. LEARNING wise I was told when I was about 10 I knew what it was and well, could talk with my mom about it.

> How old do you think children should be to learn about sex? Well, they should know there are bad people, and bad touches when they are younger, but don't say anything to make then paranoid of everythign and evryone. Flinching is a bad habbit.. for me. But children do need to know.. but about actual sex.. well they could know around the age of 10 or so. My siblings are 10, 11 and 13. They knew years before. Did not bother them and they are great kids. Full on be careful when you have sex, or when you should wait is good for about 14 now adays seeing as... how many younger people are.. well.. I frown on that. Waiting until you are ready, and you know.. my view is, if you are not ready for a child don't have sex, because you are taking the risk.

> Do you think that a child should be told by their parent of the same gender about it? It is more comfortable for the child generally. I know for me it would be more... well comfortable if my mother had told me.

> Do you think children should just be taught sex in school?
I am not really sure on this one. We learned in Kindergarten that there were bad people who would lure you into cars with promises of candy or puppies, and not to follow them. If you are told to wait for mom, wait for mom. Not someone who says your mom sent them. We learnt about many things. I still am not quite sure on this, I'm alright so I suppose it is okay. And they are teaching it older than they did before so it's not as weird.

Venya



Send private message


 PostPosted: Sat Oct 10, 2009 8:14 pm Reply with quote        
I was maybe 10. I had found my mothers stuff and started watching it. I never really got it at first until finally mother told me. I was so embarrassed on what I was watching and soon getting addicted to. She never told me about that part, I learned it at school. When They taught sex ed I felt kinda superior because I already knew this stuff. It was the period I had not known about.

But yeah I bet it scared her, My sister learned it from me too so I was even more embarrassed. that a elementary school kid knew about it. Embarrassed
Missa



Send private message


 PostPosted: Fri Oct 16, 2009 11:09 am Reply with quote        
How old were you when you learned about sex?
I was about 8 or 9. Back then my parents had me in Sunday school, and it was required for parents to tell their kids about how babies are made. It didn't really phase me, though...it just made sense. I was like "okay." Haha.

How old do you think children should be to learn about sex?
Around 9 years old. But since they're probably going to learn more about it at school, it doesn't have to be too graphic of a description. If they ask you questions, I would say it's okay to answer them, though.

Do you think that a child should be told by their parent of the same gender about it?
Yeah. It's not as awkward, then.

Do you think children should just be taught sex in school?
No, I think hearing it from parents is important too. I always thought it was less awkward hearing my mom talk about it.
At school, it was really awkward because of all the classmates around me and I didn't know the teacher very well. In 4th grade, we had sex-ed with just girls in the classroom while the boys were taught in another classroom. But then, in 7th grade, it was co-ed, which was more uncomfortable, and then we had sex-ed AGAIN in 10th grade.
Parents can answer questions that the school doesn't cover, too.

_________________

I'm so cute and fluffy, you just can't resist clicking me!
Thoth Star



Send private message


 PostPosted: Sat Oct 17, 2009 11:40 pm Reply with quote        
Well, I learned about sex when I was 11... My older brother was looking at a porn mag, he was like 14 at the time, I think. ^^;; I was in SHOCK! I was like "Why are they wrestling? D:" And my brother just made fun of me!
I think kids should know about sex when they hit puberty which is usually around 12/13/14... Around there, so they make educated decisions early ON! My dad n mom didn't tell me NUTHIN. My friends taught me about sex, which wasn't very good for me... I would have preferred to hear it from my Dad, actually but he was ALWAYS embarrassed when the word "sex" came up in conversation...>M< YES! Kids should learn about STDs in school, cause most parents don't discuss Sex at home! Especially religious families are VERY BAD at educating their kids on sex and topics relating to sex like birth control and stds. *nod*

I think schools should PASS OUT condoms! Always... XD
laniparis



Send private message


 PostPosted: Sat Oct 24, 2009 8:40 am Reply with quote        
> How old were you when you learned about sex?

I can't actually remember my exact age but it might of been around the time my first nephew was born (lol), and to be honest I'm still a little freaked out about the birds and the bees, lol


> How old do you think children should be to learn about sex?

I guess it depends on each individual child, some seem mature enough to handle it at a younger age, and others would be like "Do Spiderman and Batman do it???" lol, now THAT would be awkward


> Do you think that a child should be told by their parent of the same gender about it?

Depending on how close they are with their parents, I was a mummy's girl, so it's definitely easier hearing these things from the same parent, but yeah, maybe sometimes, not and other times even with both parents

> Do you think children should just be taught sex in school?

I don't think children mature at the same age, so you couldn't necessarily say every grade fiver can learn sex ed or not, some might just not be ready but they should all know about sexual harassment and rape, hopefully to prevent it from happening to them


To be honest, even when told about the birds and the bees until I was like eleven, I didn't really know about "Girlie Things" lol... and I started at twelve
BubbleTrouble



Send private message


 PostPosted: Thu Oct 29, 2009 2:51 pm Reply with quote        
laniparis wrote:

> How old do you think children should be to learn about sex?

I guess it depends on each individual child, some seem mature enough to handle it at a younger age, and others would be like "Do Spiderman and Batman do it???" lol, now THAT would be awkward


That would be awesome.

_________________
BubbleBurst! - My Quest thread

MelancholyMelody~ wrote:
'Sup? 'S goin' diddly-down in DA HOOD, YO?
Post new topic   Reply to topic Goto page 1, 2, 3  Next



Powered By phpBB Home | Rules | FAQ | Help | TOS | Privacy Policy | Contact us