Exceeding the relationship of a teacher.

[Chu]

As most of you know, Raz and I are dating each other. It’s been about three months; about a month before school started by my count. It’s obvious that he and I are together at school. We see each other between just about every class and are attached at the hip; you really just can’t separate us.

Anyway, we have a business teacher. Mr. Ferguson (who we call Fergie by the way. XD) is an older man that really is nice, but a bit… loud about his opinions. He’s always commenting on the two of us because Raz walks me to his class before seventh period and we talk in the hallway for a bit since his classroom is next door. At the beginning of the year Fergie would comment on our relationship: “When are you two getting married?” “What should I get you as a wedding present?” “Am I invited to the wedding?” We’d laugh it off or whatever and go to class and as the year grew on he got a bit more annoying with it. We hug each other before we go to class and he jokingly calls it PDA, but that’s really no problem.

I was absent one day and Fergie saw Raz hug our friend. He said something along the lines of “I’m telling Cara you’re cheating on her.” and said something to me the next day; I actually don’t know if he was joking or not. Raz hugs his friends and I do too. I do not care. One day, Raz was absent and Fergie said that it was because he’s “love sick”. The man continues with his jokes and such but it makes me wonder: Is he exceeding the relationship of a teacher? I believe he is, considering we’re his students, and we’re only there to learn. He does normally get familiar with his students, and I had him last year so he likes me, but talking to students about their relationships is a bit odd to me.

Also, on another point, there’s a teacher in my school – my algebra teacher from last year – that had an affair with his wife and one point with a senior; yet another example of exceeding the relationship of a TEACHER.

So, what does everyone else think? Where is the line between teacher and friend? Should teachers really even try to build connections with students beyond a professional level? Maybe is it necessary for some students, so they can connect and accept the teacher better, but to me it should be strictly professional.

[juniper_silver]

That would get annoying after a while. Although it really shouldn't be your job to establish boundaries seeing as he's the teacher, it looks like you're going to have to if you want him to stop. When there aren't a lot of people around(so that you don't embarrass him and also so that he knows you're serious, you should talk to your teacher). You could just say something like "I know you're just kidding when you make jokes about my boyfriend and I, but it really makes me uncomfortable/embarrassed". And if he still doesn't stop, go to a higher authority.

I hope this was an asking for advice thread and I wasn't just rambling at you randomly.

[Chu]

Eh, it was more along the lines of discussing when a teacher crosses the line of teacher and friend, but I don't mind.

And apparently I'm too adorable when I'm embarrassed because everyone likes to embarrass me and then comment on it. o-0 A lot of teachers, including him, laugh at it.

>.>; Which makes me more embarrassed. Which makes them gush more... Damn it all, I'm not even that cute! D:<

But it isn't so terribly annoying to where I want to get the man into trouble. It takes a lot to really annoy me anyway. :/

[Merelia]

He's definitely crossing teacher/student boundaries. But then again, I am not all shocked by his behavior, really. I use to have quite a few teachers whom felt the need to state their personal opinions on their student's personal life's, without being asked for one. I use to think it was normal, till I came upon a teacher whom seriously would get too involved, to the point of creating drama and conflict amongst students. So I guess it all depends on just how far they are going with their little remarks and statements, and whether or not they are exceeding our comfort levels... if that makes sense.

As for the teacher having an affair with a Senior, it is a very common scandal. My English teacher in high school dated one of his students right when she graduated and married her. o_O People assumed he must have been seeing her while she was his student, but he never admit to it. Oh, that, and my town had a scandal with a high school student having an affair with the school's police officer AND teacher at the same time. o_o

[LadyKai]

My Tech Ed teacher
is erm *doing* the students
i yelled at him cuz i walked in one time
i told him
im like oyu have a wife
and a new baby WTH are you doing

[Hiroku]

It seems more like he is an older uncle or something. . . rather then a teacher. . . but I mean with that one as long as he still teaches you thing. . . it should be fine. . . and I mean as long as its not making you uncomfortable.

With the sleeping with the students example with the other teacher. . . isnt that just extra credit? >_>

Okay no I was joking. . . that is wrong in most every way but it happens. . . and I dont think it is something thats not going to happen sadly.

[Chu]

@Mere: Woah, what the fuck? D: She must've been after something other than, yeah. >.>;


@Adi: Yeah, sadly it doesn't bother me so much that she was a senior because TECHNICALLY, she's an adult. It's still wrong though, don't get me wrong. But, the man had/has a wife and two (I think) kids. He doesn't need to throw that away.


@Hiro: More like Great-uncle, but you were close. XD

Hahaha to the extra credit joke. xP

[Hiroku]

haha well yeah But you got what I meant. . .

and yeah. . . i thought you would like that. I could never do that though. . . >_> Dont think I could have earned enough extra credit to pass anyways.

[Chu]

I'd never do that. ><;; With or without extra credit, that's disgusting.

Any most of my teachers are OLD. D:

[Hiroku]

I would sleep with a teach. . . but then again I am a lot older now. . .

XD I wouldnt have done it back when I was in school.

[neomattlac]

Wow. That's really getting too close for comfort. I don't think that teacher should be allowed to comment on others' relationships...

[Chu]

My thoughts exactly. He's calmed down a bit on it though; we still do hold short and casual conversations about Raz though.

[neomattlac]

That's good. I don't have to worry about the teacher talking 'bout my relationships 'case I don't have any 'cept the one gf I had, and I wouldn't even count that.

[Chu]

Oh I know what you mean. xP I severely dislike men upon first impression so for the longest time I was without a boyfriend.

[neomattlac]

Well, I just don't like getting to involved with people 'cause I'm a real introvert.