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Pikmin



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 PostPosted: Fri Sep 06, 2013 2:01 pm Reply with quote        
Wasn't sure whether to put this here or in University seeing as it's kinda serious... If a mod reads this and decides it should go there by all means move it.
So yeah, if you don't want to be dragged down or something, don't read this.

Hard to put into words 'cos it's all still spinning around my head but basically my mum had breast cancer a long time ago, but recently she and her sister have been in for genetic testing for the BRCA gene and the geneticist has told her the results are like... 80 - 90% gonna test positive for it with her family history and all.

So this pretty much means they're gonna get me in and offer to cut my boobs off (forgot the proper name for the operation) which frankly, don't care, I have good boobs but that ain't much help to a dead person. But what I hate is the thought they may also need to remove my ovaries... I'm only 26, I don't know if I want kids or not but I would've liked to have the option..

Because I'm pretty young, if I did get cancer it'd spread a lot faster than say, someone in their 70s, so it's pretty necessary, and I'll also have to go in for tests at least once every year.

tl;dr - I'm scared and worried and someone say something good so I stop worrying for a bit...


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 PostPosted: Fri Sep 06, 2013 7:34 pm Reply with quote        
Though genetic tests tell you a likelihood, statistics do vary. I'm from one of those weird families where things never match the statistics. Give novacaine to my dad's cousin/my second cousin and it does nothing. Give him 3 times the lethal dose? He feels nothing and is still trying to rip the arms off the chair at a dentist's office. Also, my dad has psoriatic arthritis. Normally, that's a genetic disease and can be tested for. But he has no genetic marker, and just like his corn allergy, he's the only one with it in our entire bloodline.

Point is, even if it's 90 percent positive, it doesn't mean it's definite- that means there's a 10 percent chance you won't after all! It more means to be more careful. Sure, you can get the surgery now. But you don't have the cancer now, and they're not telling you "you're gonna get it in the next year". I mean, when did your mom even get found to have it? It's not like you have no time either.

TL;DR: Percentages mean there's a chance you'll be fine, you don't have to rush into something that's not happening today, and weirder things have happened then statistics being flipped over like a pancake by someone. So...Yeah. ^^;

(But I do think this might suit the University more)

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Strix Varia



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 PostPosted: Fri Sep 06, 2013 8:20 pm Reply with quote        
I'm sure the doctors have already told you this but breast cancer is the slowest spreading types of cancer and the most easily treatable. Beyond the standard Chemo and Radiation therapy, they also have new pills which greatly reduce whatever it is that produces the breast cancer cells. It sounds to me like you are definately aware of your risk so you will keep very close watch for it. And you are apparently young enough so that you will be better able to recover from the treatments than an older person. I know it's sad that you have to consider needing to recover from the TREATment .. but you do.

If you do not already actually have active cancer, I highly doubt you will ever need a masectomy no matter what your genetic percentage of getting cancer is. There are about a dozen preventative and alternate steps before that becomes necessary. I am not a doctor myself but my mother had breast cancer twice and both times her doctor couldn't stress hard enough that a masectomy should be one of the absolute last considerations. And under no condition should it be a first treatment!

It might spread faster in a younger person but even spreading twice as fast is still pretty slow and gives doctors plenty of time to find it. I do encourage the yearly testing though.
Pikmin



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 PostPosted: Sat Sep 07, 2013 4:26 am Reply with quote        
Well I wouldn't rush into anything until we do get the results.. It is just really high odds, especially given mums family history. Think grandad had it, great grandad... Load of others... Auntie..
Family Trees are fun...

Mum had it and we almost lost her from it, so that's why I'm taking it so seriously I guess. Really I just wanted to get it all out of my head and into text. I worry a lot, and the odds are just really high..

It was the doctors themselves that recommended the masectomy (thanks Strix, I'm so bad with names of stuff..) because of my age etc, but not until we get the results. And frankly it's not that which bothers me at all, breasts are just... eh, they're alright but not worth getting ill for lol.
Really it's all just the worry of surgery, illness, the possibility of removing the ovaries, and the fact my brothers and nephew will probably have to worry about this stuff too. He's only one and a half, it's horrible to think of what this may mean for him.

I feel a bit better talking about it all at least, I'm sure you guys know what it's like to get a worry in your head.. It wont be until next month I get the results - I kinda want to hope for the best but at the same time prepare for the worst with those odds.


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 PostPosted: Sat Sep 07, 2013 11:25 am Reply with quote        
Due to the personal tone of this topic, I'll leave it here unless Pickmin herself wants it moved.


I'm sorry to hear that you're going through this, Pikmin.

People say you should always get a second opinion when it comes to health and medicine, just to put things into perspective. There's that.

And your concern is understandable. I think anyone would feel the same way that you do. It sounds like you've made up your mind, so you want people to reaffirm that you're making the right decision and comfort you for the sacrifices that you have to make. Even still, I'll give you the brief advice (again) not to make a decision without having a second opinion, and not to make a decision until everything is certain.

In that event, I do truly think that you are making a good choice. It seems like you're approaching this difficult situation with enough caution and level-headedness to get you through things well. And, you'll have your mom and other loved ones by your side to support you. Your family loves you, and your friends (counting us, I hope) do too. We will support you.

The prospect of losing your ovaries must be very hard to face. Just remember that you are worth much more than your ability to produce children. You can still raise your own children regardless. Don't forget that. You are a person who has a lot to offer the world. I do not mean to discount the weight of this potential loss on you right now. I understand. I just want you to remember that you are more important than any of your body parts combined. Always.

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Pikmin



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 PostPosted: Sat Sep 07, 2013 1:05 pm Reply with quote        
Thanks Chu.. I know this'll sound soppy but I don't think someone (other than mum) has said something that nice to me in a long time.

Feeling more optimistic today - I mean there is still a chance everything'll work out alright. Just not a very big one. And even if it doesn't, there are still a lot of things we can do about it..
But I know I've got people around me who care, even dad. He actually said something NICE about me today. It's like, wow this really must be serious..

The thought of the ovaries does still get to me, though I guess there is the option to freeze eggs.. Not sure completely how it works. Or I could even adopt.. This is all long in the future talk, never thought I'd be thinking about it now.

Today has been good at least, got some of my favourite crisps, stinky sour cream and chive Big Grin If something cheers you up, who cares if it's a silly thing lol


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 PostPosted: Sat Sep 07, 2013 1:31 pm Reply with quote        
I'm glad it touched you. ^^

It's good that your mom and dad have been there for you lately. And yeah, I hadn't even thought about the option to freeze eggs! For now though, just focus on being happy.

I love sour cream and chive chips, haha. If it makes you happy, then so be it. /o/

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 PostPosted: Sat Sep 07, 2013 2:47 pm Reply with quote        
I have been doing my best, helped tonight with a load of junk tv on lol... X-Factor. It's terrible, but watchable terrible.. Like watching a snob fall into a pool.

I've been talking through it a lot with mum as well, knowing more about it all makes it easier somehow, guess ignorance is bliss isn't relevant every time, at least not for me. It's probably a strange thing to say but I've always been fascinated in things like genes etc... Just wish mine weren't so crappy lol

I wanna hug Chu... Why do I have to live in the UK Duh


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Chu
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 PostPosted: Sat Sep 07, 2013 4:36 pm Reply with quote        
Haha, yes. XD It's always so satisfying.

And I know I've already said it, but it really is great that you're talking to your mom. Some people face these things without having someone like that close to them, and it can be very hard to do. I'm sure it provides her comfort too.

D'awww, online hugs will have to do. (For now. Jab) *Hugs*

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Pikmin



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 PostPosted: Sat Sep 07, 2013 5:33 pm Reply with quote        
To be honest X-Factor lately is annoying me, they used to go through a lot of acts, you'd see a lot of good, a lot of dumb... Now they just focus on a few acts, it's really boring.

Me and mum are really close, we talk to each-other about everything. She even makes pervy jokes to me sometimes, it's bizarre xD I want to be as prepared for it as possible to help her too, it can't be easy watching your own child go through this. Even if I'm not really a child anymore. She's been through it all herself so she'll know it all..

Soft Smile *hugs* <(o.o<)


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Chu
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 PostPosted: Thu Sep 12, 2013 4:50 pm Reply with quote        
I'm sorry for taking so long to respond, Pikmin. I feel awful.


I'm sure she appreciates the understanding and empathy that you exhibit for her. And you know you'll always be her child. :P

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Pikmin



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 PostPosted: Thu Sep 12, 2013 5:14 pm Reply with quote        
Don't worry about it, people can't be around here all the time~

I was kinda moping around for quite a while about it but I just saw how sad it was making her, can't be doing that.
I'm kinda like.. I'm not happy if people around me aren't happy. When I was in my band I'd put up with doing songs I really didn't like when everyone was enjoying them.

Maybe I'm just a wuss xD


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 PostPosted: Thu Sep 12, 2013 6:30 pm Reply with quote        
I don't think you're a wuss, but I'm the same way, so maybe I'm just in denial. xP We can comfort each other about our wussiness though!

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 PostPosted: Sat Sep 14, 2013 1:05 pm Reply with quote        
WUSSES UNITE!
Or at least we would if we weren't too wussy to make a group.. :p

Struggling a bit today, I don't have many friends irl but it's never bothered me 'cos it's quality vs quantity.. My best friend is going university tomorrow though, really gonna miss him.

Tell him to stay here...
Nah, I want him to do well - I know how much he hates working in retail, now he's pursuing what he really wants to do.

Anyone ever been totally confused by their feelings though? Like I care about him a LOT but I don't know if it's "love" or he's just a really really good friend. All I know is if anyone hurt him they'd be dead in a lake the next day.


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Juneberry



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 PostPosted: Sat Sep 14, 2013 1:19 pm Reply with quote        
There are many types of love. Feeling an extremely close friendship is still a kind of love...I think what you should do is think about your feelings of love and think of what way they relate to other people you love. Do you feel it's similar to your other friends? Or is it more like your relatives? Things like that will help you figure out what kind of love it is. But I think what matters most at this point is you love him at all, and that you're trying your best to let him be happy too. <3

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